It is my belief that life's best lessons come from people who can't talk, but can gurgle.

Caleb is crawling. I mean, seriously, last March he was a piece of Silly Putty that would suck on a bottle and go limp the minute he finished. He'd sleep for, like millions of hours, and when he woke up he wanted more milk.

"Wooooooah partner!" Seems like all I have been saying today as the little guy speeds around the hardwood floor trying to dig in to mommy and daddy's filing cabinets or puppy's food bowl or on to the wii fitness board. He has that look of fascination in his eyes that you forget that we are even born with. I mean, my cell phone rang and his eyes lit as he jiggled himself to the tune. The way the dog sneezes excites the hell out of him and when I clap it's like I just offered him an all expense paid trip to the moon. I mean, to him, I'm amazing. We forget that as we get older... when everything someone does is amazing. Anything I do is amazing. Yet, everything to him in comparison seems so hard.

This afternoon, after Caleb's nap, I pull out his colored stacking cups. I stack them and he punches them with his little hamburger patty sized hand and then tries to restack them like me. You can tell he gets frustrated because he wants to do it just like me... but what he doesn't know is it's just going to take time to be able to do that. He's doesn't want to wait, though. He wants stuff to come to him and be easy and natural like all the things he's good at doing... like crawling. But what he doesn't know is that he'll be like me soon... he's just got to let time help him do it.

Lately, I've been stacking my cups and it seems like someone keeps swooping in to knock them over. It seems like I can't keep them stacked as tall or orderly or cleanly or quickly or nicely as other people around me. My life is just all over the place and bumpier than usual. I feel like I chose some dirt road to ride my bike on while everyone around me is on cement.

But what I do know is exactly what Caleb doesn't yet know. I want my answers. I want it right now. I want things to be like everyone else. I don't want things to frustrate me. I want to be good at my life. But like wanting to walk when all Caleb can do is crawl, I just need to trust and believe and look forward to when that time will come where instead of being amazed by everyone else I will, again, be amazed by my self.