A phone conversation with Pops:

Dad: I'm just really happy L.A. didn't work out and that things are happening for you in Chicago.
Me: Happy? How come?
Dad: I didn't want you to get in to porn.
Me: I... wait, porn? When was I going to get in to porn?
Dad: I don't know... isn't that what people do if they don't make it in L.A? Porn?
Me: Um...
Dad: I mean there's all kinds of porn out there.
Me: Uh...
Dad: And, you're a Flitsch so...
Me: Stop!
Dad: I'm just saying...
Me: Stop!
Dad: I'm just glad you're not going. I'd really miss you.
Me: Me too.
Dad: I love you.
Me: I love you, too.
Dad: And I'm glad you're not doing porn.
Me: STOP!